The Dream Pedlar

unexpected self-discoveries in the pursuit of writing

A few weeks ago, I was informed by email that one of my (non-fiction) pieces has been selected to appear in a soon-to-be-published local anthology. I was delighted at first, but doubt followed quickly thereafter. It was a rather raw and vulnerable piece, and I felt a little terrified at

Tales for Dreamers

tales for dreamers: hopscotch

Begin with the heart. Always. If it is light enough, leap on to the blue cloud. Be warned, it has a tendency to drift. If it pleases (I suppose tales of the land and the sea would keep the cloud pleased enough), it will take you to the peak of

Tales for Dreamers

tales for dreamers: believable tales

When my grandfather died, my mother told me he had to go away on an urgent mission. I knew all about death and that everyone dies, sooner or later than we’d like, and that no one really knows what happens after. But I also knew this was my mother’

Life, unadulterated

story of a vaccination, and of sadness - my everlasting companion and guide

I've just returned home after getting my first shot of the AstraZeneca vaccine, the only vaccine currently available to adults 40 years or older who do not fall in any of the priority or high-risk categories as detailed by the Ontario provincial government. I suppose I've been truly lucky to

Tales for Dreamers

tales for dreamers: mid-spring snow party

No plans are made. No invitations are extended. But at the first whiff of the possibility of snow in the air, long after winter has departed, the little ones creep out of their hiding places. It doesn’t take them long. This is one of those events they eagerly wait

Tales for Dreamers

tales for dreamers: standing still

If I had to stay in one place for long enough, I might as well be a tree, I suppose. How difficult would that be? To grow roots, commit my life to this patch of ground I stand on, vowing to the soil that hugs me I wouldn’t part

Books

dying wishes

My latest novel, 'Dying Wishes', is out now! It's up on Amazon (both ebook and paperback versions), and also on Kobo. I'm working to put it up on other retailer platforms while also trying to figure out how to make paperbacks available in India (as Amazon does not have this

Mindfulness

moments of respite

There it was again. That feeling. Despondency. Desperation. That feeling of being 'stuck' in the same place for far too long. That need to run away. That temptation to burn up that sensation in smoke, or stuff it down with chocolate, or fall into some fantasyland on Netflix or in

Motherhood

when I try to juggle and all the balls fall down

I struggle with being a mother and a writer at the same time. When D is at home, I find it impossible to get any writing done. When he is at home, I want to spend time with him. But after a few hours of being with him, something starts

On Writing

the end!

At exactly 12:08 PM this afternoon, I wrote these words 'The End' on my WIP. My second book but my first ever novel! A tome of about 135,000 words. I treated myself to a nice long walk in the snow and a long soak in a warm bath

Mindfulness

on self-love

This past month has been difficult. We've all been in some state of lockdown for so long now that I assumed I had gotten used to it, more or less, that I had figured out a way to cope with it and make the most of it. I remember telling

Motherhood

being our own champion

I have only one word to describe this past week: Rich. Rich in terms of learning and understanding. I spent several nights reading The Broken Circle: A Memoir of Escaping Afghanistan written by Enjeela Ahmadi-Miller. She recounts her family's escape from their hometown, Kabul, during the Soviet invasion in 1980.

On Writing

making choices and making mistakes - deciding what matters in 2021

Sometime last week, a trip to the optometrist finally laid to rest all the questions I had had these past several months (since March actually, since the beginning of the pandemic lockdown here) about the incessant headaches and phases of blurry vision I'd been having. Armed with a prescription for

On Writing

antidote to a nagging discontent

I missed posting an update last Sunday, not because I didn't remember to but because I couldn't bear to look at my laptop screen any more than I already had that week. My feelings this past fortnight have ranged from complete elation to utter dejection and self-rejection. I have swung

On Writing

crossing a milestone by 'failing forward'

I started work on my current WIP in January 2019. I jotted down ideas in general along with a plot outline and even wrote a bit I suppose, until a phone call from a family member in February completely derailed me and took me away from the WIP for several

On Writing

starting over as an author-entrepreneur at 40

I turned forty two weeks ago. My birthday itself was a pleasant occasion and I celebrated it with my husband and four-year-old and cake. Wishes poured in from family overseas, and I remember feeling loved and content in the moment. But in the weeks leading up to my birthday, I

Milestones

happy birthday to me!

Another year has passed. Another decade. A good four decades, in fact. And I am already loving it here. All the roads unfurl ahead of me. It's as if I have only just begun.

Motherhood

i miss D.

My little one is at school, his second full day of school, and I miss him so much. I miss him with an ache, an anguish. I just can't stop crying. Yesterday, I was filled with a strange kind of restless energy, worrying about how D would be faring on

Motherhood

one thing ends when another begins, a new moment is born only when the old one dies ...

If I had to pick a theme to paint my life with, it would have to be 'nostalgia'. Or 'grief for the past'. For everything new that comes my way, I tend to grieve all that I've had to leave behind. Perhaps this is a consequence of having spent much

On Writing

readership versus inventory

I was looking at some of my old stories and posts on my earlier site and came across a post I'd written back in April 2013, wondering which social media platform I ought to be using to promote my stories and gain readership. Funnily, I don't think I'd ever thought

On Writing

a conundrum

A fortnight ago, I was elated at having found a possible solution to this never-ending conundrum I face, this unsolvable puzzle of finding a balance between freelance editing and fiction writing. After I put up that post, I worked on my novel for not one single day! Not one word

Tales for Dreamers

tales for dreamers: into the maze

Today, the maze is shaped like concentric triangles, with bridges strategically placed. Some to connect, some to divide. You begin at the outside, and make your way in. When you reach a dead end, as you surely will, simply retrace your steps to that familiar fork and go down the

On Writing

writing as a practice

This has been a week of incredible epiphanies, and in my excitement to capture the essence of all of them at once in this single post, I'm quite unable to decide where to start. Chronology is as good a solution as any other to this conundrum. It all began when

Mindfulness

an enlightenment

At every opportunity I get, I love saying that motherhood is the biggest spiritual journey I've ever set out on in my life and that Dr. Shefali Tsabary is the spiritual guru I had been seeking all my life but found only after I became a mother. Her teachings on

Motherhood

in silence

The other day, D asked me if every sound can be expressed using letters of the alphabet. And I promptly answered yes. Surely, we have a letter or we can concoct a combination of letters to mimic every sound. That's what I thought at first, until I realised that no,

Mindfulness

my mind and me

In a conversation with an old friend this evening, about the pandemic and concern for our families in different parts of the world, about anxiety and regrets, we unburdened ourselves and eventually made our ways, yet again, to the realisation that we really are doing the best we can at

Motherhood

the pressure to do, the need to be

Last evening, I was perusing my old website, The Dream Pedlar’s, with the intention of transferring my posts from there, one by one, over to this new home. And I came across something special. A year and a half ago, just before D was about to start attending a

On Writing

keep writing and carry on!

I came across a quote today on a Facebook group I had decided to stay away from for a while but couldn’t help taking a sneak peek at when this post popped up on my newsfeed. Don’t quit. It’s very easy to quit during the first ten

On Writing

a new home

It is quite like moving into a new home. First you bring with you the bare essentials, and you’re truly amazed at how little you really need to survive. Then, you envision how you’d fill up this vast, mostly-empty space, with all your furniture. And then your belongings

On Writing

the gift of time

The phone call came last summer, shortly before I had completed my last course for the degree I was pursuing. There was a spot available in the Infant Room of a daycare that had opened only the previous autumn. We had put ourselves on the waitlist after a visit in

Tales for Dreamers

tales for dreamers: hello, dreamer ...

Mesdames, Messieurs, poppets and imps, mischief-makers and trouble-seekers, I have for you, for all of you, for each and every one of you, dreams of all sensations and durations. Dreams that will take your breath away, fantasies that will thrill and overwhelm, illusions that will leave you spellbound. Reveries for